Monday, February 27, 2006

Dr. Dhakna (bottlecap) Chaudry (DDC) Part III – Murder by Anesthesia

Click here to read DDC Part I

Click here to read DDC Part II

It is said DDC ended up on Irish coast, through the help of some Jamaicans. How and why had they helped him? We still don’t know. According to him, they admired his wrestler physique and his ability to release marijuana smoke through his ears. We never challenged this fact as he did really release smoke from his ears. A medical abnormality.

He decided to start a new life with a new British wife (Oh I forgot to mention, he got the neighbor’s wife with the ambulance as Dowry from Nigeria). Having settled in Dublin, he got a low profile job as a general anesthetist.

Life was cool and calm for DDC and the people around him. The wintry days subdued DDC for a start. His pace of thinking slowed, not due to age but because the Doctor had never experienced such cold weather. The Doctor decided to use the time to contemplate and start afresh a new life in this firang (foreign) country. A respectable start.

However winters do not last long anywhere and spring sprung back the wily DDC into action. Respectable starts aside, DDC got back to old stretcher habits of listening to cricket commentary and eating monkey (pine) nuts.

But one day a most foul incident took place. One of the ICU patients died due to an overdose of anesthesia. But the Anesthetist was not DDC. On further investigation pine nut shells were found stuck in the anesthesia machine. Of course, DDC used to vacuum those shells off the hospital bed with the anesthesia machine tube.

Although DDC got away with the anesthesia incident, he did make a lot of enemies at Pakistan Centre, which also served as a part time Islamic centre. He had been warned from entering the Sunni dominant Islamic centre. People feared he would corrupt young kids with his different praying style and emphasis on Maula Ali.

Eventually DDC was deported from Ireland. Someone at the Islamic centre with contacts in immigration could not stand his continued presence in Dublin.
DDC lived the next few years in low profile. He got a job at the local steel mill as the Factory doctor, until his prodigal nephew sent him a pilgrimage visa for Saudi Arabia.